Scotland

England and Scotland have a complicated relationship (duhh).

Leaving aside the long, violent struggle between the English and the Scots (have you seen Braveheart?) to focus on the present, big things are brewing up in Edinburgh that might mean the end of the "United" Kingdom.

In the briefest summary possible: The Acts of Union in 1707 joined the two kingdoms, forming "Great Britain." All decisions concerning Scotland were henceforth decided by the Parliament of Great Britain in Westminster, London. The Scotland Act of 1998 established a separate, devolved Scottish Parliament based in Edinburgh. In May of this year the Scottish National Party won a majority in the Scottish Parliament. The SNP is a center-left political party whose main platform is Scottish independence. They released plans for a referendum to become independent from the United Kingdom tentatively scheduled for 2015. I'm no expert, and can't definitively say whether this referendum will happen or not, in 2015 or in the future, but it seems very possible that within my lifetime, Scotland will secede from the United Kingdom. Just something to think about.

Anyhow, I decided to visit England's northern neighbor, land of haggis and bagpipes, of clans and heather and highlands, for a weekend jaunt with my roommate Jill. To be honest, it was an impulse decision. Jill had planned her solo trip weeks in advance, but easily convinced me to tag along at the last minute - I bought a ticket on the overnight bus two hours before it was scheduled to depart from London Victoria coach station, haphazardly threw some jeans and sweaters in a backpack, and hustled out the front door behind her. It didn't take much, all she had to do was mention the depressingly low number of days we had left in London and I was getting out my credit card. What can I say? I'm easily persuaded when it comes to travel. 


We took a National Express bus overnight (£45 round trip booked in advance, £60 for me) that arrived in Edinburgh at 7:45am. Jill had made a reservation at the Blue Rainbow Aparthotel, which was located less than 500 feet from the Bus Station, I kid you not - so convenient for ditching our bags before walking into town. Ordinarily, I would have read the "Scotland" section of my Rick Steves guidebook ten times before coming, but this time I obviously hadn't and had no idea what to expect. The solution to my dilemma: a free (college kids <3 free) walking tour at 11am. To kill time, we spent several hours finding breakfast and shopping around the Royal Mile in the Old Town. Our big spend was several lambswool scarves by Johnston's from the Highlands Store. 

The Scott Monument, dedicated to Sir Walter Scott. The ferris wheel is part of the Winter Wonderland Christmas set-up. 


Our walking tour was excellent. The company is called New Europe, and they do free 3-hour walking tours in cities across Europe. The tours are generally lead by students, who may be natives or not. If you enjoy the tour, you tip your guide what you believe is appropriate at the end. I had taken one of their tours in Amsterdam and been very impressed. Our guide this time was English, and although he spoke at a speed that any non-native English speaker would have struggled with, I had no difficulty and laughed a lot on the tour. What I like about the New Europe tours is their personality - the guides are knowledgeable and present all of the correct historical information during the tour, but their personality comes through easily as well. The dirty jokes and anecdotes that pepper their commentary makes history stick in a way it otherwise would not. I always leave with plenty of funny "did you knows?" and historical tidbits that could only ever be useful for Quiz Night at the pub or in a heated game of Trivial Pursuit. If you and I ever find ourselves in Edinburgh, you're in for a good time. I'll show you how to spit on the stone heart where the door of the tax office used to be, make you cringe as I explain the cruel humiliation criminals and thiefs were forced to endure as punishment, and entertain you with stories of graveyard ghosts.


We walked past all the major sights in the Old Town - St. Giles' Cathedral, Greyfriars Kirkyard, and Edinburgh Castle to name a few - ending in the West Princes Street Gardens. Both Jill and I wanted to backtrack to the Elephant House for a late lunch, famous as the cafe where J. K. Rowling wrote the first two Harry Potter books. It was doubly exciting for me because elephants are my favorite animals. 
  
  

We debated an afternoon activity in the cafe over pizza. The choice between the newly renovated National Museum of Scotland and Edinburgh Castle was difficult, but both closed at 5pm and we had to choose. The Museum of Scotland won because: a) free entry and b) Dolly the cloned sheep. 

By five o'clock, the sky was pitch black - darkness falls so early these days! We walked up the Royal Mile to the Castle but couldn't see much. Rather than doing a pub crawl that night, we decided to relax at our hotel, in relative luxury with a TV that works and dining room table. One stop at Jenners of Edinburgh for souvenirs and one at Sainsburys for food on the way, and we were all set for a perfect girls night. It was sublime to relax with tortellini, ice cream, Glamour magazine, and Bad Teacher. I'm not ashamed to admit that we were both asleep by midnight because we slept so poorly on the bus and because our highlands tour left at 7:45am the following day. I needed a full night of sleep to overcome the lurgy that had been plaguing me all week, but which I had ignored when buying my ticket to Scotland. Judging by my boss' use of the term, I think "lurgy" describes something between a head cold and the flu, but I've heard that it also means cooties. 

The next day was entirely devoted to a full day tour - Monsters, Mountains, and Massacres: Loch Ness, Glen Coe, and the Highlands by the Highland Experience. It was a great value at only £36. Our tour guide was named Kenny, and Kenny liked to play Scottish music and stories on tape in between his narration. Those bits were a nice touch, especially since a good portion of the 12 hour tour was spent in the bus. The first stop in Kilmahog was strictly for coffee and toilets. But we did meet someone very special there - meet Hamish, the Highland Cow (pronounced: Heilan' coo). 

My friend Hamish

We reboarded the bus with some fresh scones and jam (no coffee, for once). The view from our mini-coach on one of the few highways through the mountains, what Kenny referred to as the higgledy piggledy road, was magnificent - moody, saturated with deep blues and greens, with thin silver streams winding down the sides of each mountain. Those prone to motion sickness would have really suffered on this ride - the bus jumped up and down over bumps and rocked side to side through the nonstop turns. Eventually we reached Glen Coe. Glen Coe, the "weeping glen," was the site of the 1692 massacre, which was a horrific abuse of the Scottish tradition of hospitality. If you want the story, you'll have to look it up for yourself!
  
 The Highlands

 Glen Coe


Between Glen Coe and the next big tourist draw (Loch Ness), Kenny pulled over to show us the ruins of Inverlochy Castle - not the luxury hotel in Fort William of the same name, but the historic Old Inverlochy Castle, a fortress built in the 13th century and abandoned in the mid-17th century.  We climbed around the towers like we were in a playground, peeking through thin windows to see Ben Nevis, the tallest mountain in the UK. 


Inside one of the towers
  
  
On the way to Fort Augustus and Loch Ness, Kenny tried to convince us all that the Loch Ness Monster was not only real, but was in fact a clever female prehistoric aquatic dinosaur named Nessie. He was devastated when he realized that the majority of the group were non-believers,  even threatening to toss a few people off the bus. Jill believed, however, and was determined to find the "puppy" hiding in the long, deep lake. 

  


The sun faded early again, leaving us in darkness by late afternoon. Kenny made another unexpected stop in the forest alongside the highway, allowing us to stretch our legs on a hike up to a loud river crashing down the side of the hills. And he surprised us once more with a stop by Loch Oich to see the haunted Well of the Seven Heads. He really was a great tour guide, engaging, experienced, and intent on us getting the best experience time and daylight allowed.  

Loch Oich - I love the mossy wooden piers being swallowed by the lake.

There is only one thing I would have changed on the tour, and Jill would agree with me on this - I would have enjoyed an earlier stop in Pitlochry. The tour stopped there for coffee and restrooms before the the last stretch of road back to Edinburgh. The shops looked really adorable and unique, and from the prices in the window displays seemed affordable, but by the time we arrived (around 6pm on a Saturday) they had all closed. 

For dinner in Edinburgh, we chose a comfortable pub in Hunter Square called the Advocate: salmon and red pepper skewers with rose wine for me, pie and Staropramen for Jill. The ride on the overnight bus back to London was not without problems - for instance, we woke up freezing when the heat broke down around two in the morning, forcing us to huddle inside a rest stop for close to an hour while the mechanic tinkered with it. Thankfully, I slept through the remainder of the journey and woke up back in my beloved London, and all was well again. 

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